Communication essentials that we tend to often ignore
What’s in it for THEM
Have you ever noticed yourself taking so much time speaking that even you forget what the original thought or question was? Or, because you speak so much, since you like to hear to hear your own voice, that you lose the attention of the person or a group with whom you are sharing the information? No one cares what you say or about your opinions unless it solves or addresses some type of question or problem for them. Unless this is the case, you may have listeners nodding their heads but nothing is being heard, and they most definitely not paying any attention to you or to what you are sharing, can can’t wait to get out of that conversation and/or meeting. So, when you find yourself in such situation, try this, stop talking and see what happens. To give you a sneak peek, what you will notice happening is that people will all of the sudden begin sharing their thoughts and ideas, and/or being asking questions.
Dialogue, Not Monologue
So, what is the purpose of the productive conversation and/or meeting? Typically, the main purpose is to learn or to relay new and important information, not for you to speak for 90% of the time, without allowing other people to ask questions or express concerns. You want to have a dialogue, not a monologue. If the purpose of the meeting or conversation not to brainstorm, then you should ask yourself – do you need to have a meeting or conversation after all. Why waste someone else’s time if you do not intend to listen to them and hear that they have to say.
How to have an effective conversation
The basics of an effective communication is simple – speak less, listen more. Allow another party to share their thoughts, ideas, opinions freely and without interruptions from you. Listen more and take notes, whether mental or on paper. Show another person that you care and are paying attention. At the end of conversation, feel free to ask follow-up questions based on notes that you’ve taken, and ask for clarification points as needed. As tempting as it may be sometimes to interject you point of view while someone is speaking, don’t. Wait until they are done before sharing your point(s) of view. If people with whom you are speaking feel that they are being heard, they, in turn, will listen and pay attention whenever it is your turn to speak. It’s amazing how this works, and all we should do is stop talking and just listen.
Believe it or not but you don’t know it all. Therefore, in order to keep learning and developing personally and professionally, we must remember about the importance of silence when it is appropriate, while giving your undivided attention to people around you versus letting your ego to control the conversation.
I hope you enjoyed reading this module as much as I enjoyed writing it, and hope that you found it to be very useful for you or someone else that you may know. Please feel free to share this post if you know someone who may benefit from reading it same way you did
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