Module 82 - Owning your successes and failures

The challenges and benefits of the choices and decision that we make

Throughout our entire life, we will face many choices for us to make and, of course, with each choice comes an outcome or result – good or bad, positive or negative. Regardless of the outcome it’s important for us to remember to own the result and learn from it. If we made a mistake or wrong decision, we do not want to repeat the same mistake again, because, if we do then it becomes a choice that we are making, and no longer a mistake.

Living with the choices we make

It’s not easy to make a choice, especially if the choice you are making involves the potential outcome which would affect not only you and your future, but also the future of others. The level of importance of making the right choice increases significantly, because, you obviously want to make the right decision and the right choice. So, you are probably thinking and expecting for me to give you the secret recipe for making the right choices, however, I am going to disappoint you here if this was your expectation. I cannot and will not give you a secret recipe simply because there’s no such thing. If someone is telling you otherwise, I would think twice before accepting such guidance. Each choice that we make is individual ad unique to us, in our particular situation, on that particular day, at that particular time, with the circumstance which we are facing at that moment in time. No one has been in that exact situation that you had experienced and lived through, therefore, how can anyone tell you how you supposed to react and what choice you supposed to make? The answer to this question is very simple – they cannot, no one can. Only you can make a choice and decide what is the right thing to do for whatever you are facing and dealing with. What other people can do is share their own personal experiences in perhaps similar situations, but that is about it, and then you would make a decision what piece of their example, if any, that you may use to help you to make more educated decision based on your unique situation. So, how do you know if the decision you are making is the right one?

Making the best decision – taking action and accepting the outcome

You would never know if the choice you are making is the best one until you actually take a leap of faith and move forward with what you feel is the right decision. Once the decision has been made, the next step is to analyze the outcome of that decision and see if it delivered the result(s) which you were expecting. If the outcome is positive and what you were expecting, then you can consider your decision as successful. However, if the result of your decision and choice is not what you were hoping for, or if you had failed as a result, then take some time and create a detailed step-by-step analysis of your decision-making process and steps you’ve taken to understand where in that process is an opportunity to make some changes, try something different and learn from those opportunities uncovered, address them, and try again. Often, we must try again and again until we achieve the outcome that we want and expect.

What if I am not sure if I want to try again?

If you ever find yourself asking this question, then whatever you are going after, the outcome which you are seeking is not something that you really want, you just kinda want it. Therefore, as soon as you run into an obstacle, challenge, or a decision which let to failure, you have no desire to try again, you have no interest to learn from your opportunities and improve, all you are hoping for is a quick win, and quick win is very different from long-term success and inner value-fulfillment. If you really care about something, if it is one of your most important values, then you will not stop trying, despite a series of failure, until you finally find what you are seeking. This is what separates passion, value, or dream, from interests and wishes.

Owing your successes and failures – decisions that either make us or break us

The decision we make in life either bring us closer to where we want and expect to be or they are taking us further back, away from inner personal and financial freedom and happiness. Regardless of the choices we make, we must be ready to own our decisions regardless of the outcome they yield. Same way when we make commitments to ourselves and others, we must own and follow through on those commitments, because, that is what’s building our character, confidence, trust, and respect. Therefore, when you make a certain decision, you must own the outcome, learn from each experience, and keep on trying until you are happy with a result in your own definition of success. If this is something that you really desire, if this is what helps you get up every morning and keep going, then you will not give up. If you choose to stop trying and give up, then you should ask yourself what is important to you and re-evaluate your values, because, whatever you gave up on what not really important to you, not important enough to be considered as one of your value. As Niccolo Machiavelli said in his book “The Prince”: “All courses of action are risky, so prudence is not in avoiding danger (it’s impossible), but calculating risk and acting decisively. Make mistakes of ambition and not mistakes of sloth. Develop the strength to do bold things, not the strength to suffer.”

I hope you enjoyed reading and find this module very useful for you or someone else that you may know. Please feel free to share this blog module if you know someone who may benefit from reading to it

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