Module 72 - How to become more assertive - Recognize and Recommend Approach

Personal Development, Leadership, and Motivation Blog Series

Can anyone become more assertive when the situation calls for it? I think so. What happens most of the time is us failing to recognize that we need to turn it up a notch and show some assertiveness. Instead, we continue to act without making any adjustments to our approach and then wondering why we are not being taken as seriously as we would like.

​Unleashing the confidence inside

Not everyone is naturally assertive. Some of us are much more soft spoken and prefer softer approach to any conversation, even though somewhere deep inside we really ready to unleash that confident and assertive persona that we have been keeping closely guarded in order to be liked and accepted by others regardless of situation that we may be in.

​Taking the time to think and recognize

Do most people have the necessary level of assertiveness within them and are capable of using it when situation call for it? Sure. However, in most cases we fail to recognize the time when we need to be more assertive, because, we forget to take time that we need and recognize that things are not going the way we expect them to, we are afraid to ask questions not wanting to appear rude or too direct, even though the other person may be waiting for us to step it up and display some confidence and assertiveness. Unfortunately, we tend to focus on what others may think of us, how they may perceive us, therefore, we keep our extensive knowledge and expertise to ourselves, thereby missing on some major opportunities in business and in life. So, it’s important not to get consumed by others’ thoughts and opinions and when appropriate voice our own views and concerns.

​'It's not what you say but how you say it'

What’s also important to remember, that it’s not what you say, but how you say it. Instead of telling someone what to do and how to do it, position it in the way of recommendation, inviting everyone to share their ideas, while tying in their ideas to your recommendation. People want and often expect to be part of the decision-making process, so let them. At the end of the day, you would want to be included in the decision-making process and asked for your input as well, right?

​Collaboration is the key of productive negotiation

Collaboration is a critical part of any productive negotiation. What’s important to remember is taking the necessary time to recognize where you are in the conversation and not being afraid to share your recommendations when it is the most appropriate. This is even more critical for business leaders and managers, as people who work with them often depend on their opinions and decisions to move the business forward. By being more assertive and by sharing your views and ideas, should help you to see others think of your recommendations and create a more effective constructive argument and help them see and understand your point of view. Don’t be afraid to speak up when opportunity calls for it

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