Module 52 - Conformation to others' thoughts and opinions is the ultimate downfall - What do you think and want?
Leadership & Personal Development Blog Series
Do you know what you want out of life? Do you know your lifetime goal or dream? If not, then most likely you are spending your time and energy to fulfill someone else’s goals and dreams.
I feel that many people are so overwhelmed with life’s daily challenges, obligations that we have, and just daily grind, that we completely forget about our wants, wishes that we have desire to fulfill, our dreams, things that we talk about with those that know us for who we are and where we came from. We tend to lose our voice and opinions, and conform to the opinions of others. Why is that? Why is it easier for someone to conform and go along with what other people think versus following our opinions, and voicing them when appropriate?
Conform or Create a New Path?
I think the biggest reason for this is because it is simply easier to conform, then create your own path, and implement your ideas into action. Why should we try or work harder if someone has already done that and paved a pre-determined path for us to follow – the guided path, where you don’t ask any questions and just follow directions given. It is easier, sure, but what do you accomplish by following preset path? Not much, if anything at all. You do what other people want and expect you to do, get paid for your efforts, whatever the predetermined rate is, and nothing more. You cover your minimum monthly obligations, and repeat the same path every day. On the rare occasion when someone asks you for your opinion you are almost afraid to share because of being afraid to be held accountable for your suggestions or to add more work for yourself. Therefore, you stick to status quo and keep your thoughts and opinions to yourself, supporting others who are brave enough to say something, which may or may not be the best option for you. You are ok with it because nothing needs to be done on your part, except to continue and follow someone else’s path.
Complain vs. Act?
Then you go home and complain how unfair life is and how you can never get out of the situation that you may be in, or to improve your and your family’s life style – get a bigger house, purchase new car, go shopping and actually buy whatever you or your significant other wants, without checking your back account to see if there’s enough money to pay rent for the apartment you may be living in and put gas into your car.
Why do we continue to do this to ourselves and continue live the life helping other people reach their dreams, versus working towards reaching ours?
We are afraid of challenge, changing our safe and known lifestyle to something new, unknown, even though this is what we secretly want. A lot of times we are afraid to put in more work than what is being asked of us. We want better life for ourselves and others that depend on us, but we don’t want to put in everything we’ve got to get there. Well, here’s the thing that you probably don’t want to hear or think about, in order to achieve the lifestyle that you want and to have the things that you want to have, you must put in everything you’ve got, all of your energy and time, every available minute to work towards that goal.
Learn and invest in self-development or wait?
Things don’t just happen on their own where all of the sudden you are extremely wealthy and happy with life, you’ve got to work for it. Whether it is learning everything you can about the position that you want in your company without waiting until someone comes to you and asks if you are ready to learn, which will almost never happen, or starting your own business and begin pursuing your dreams on your own terms. Whatever it may be for you, the key here is moving forward and actually taking steps on your own path versus path that someone else created for you.
Don’t give up on your goal
You can be extremely successful working in the corporate world if you are ready to work hard to reach the position that you want to reach in the company. Sure, you may be at bottom of the organization chart and far from where you ultimately want to be, but it does not mean that you cannot get there when you choose to invest in self-development and becoming an expert in each role you hold until you reach your goal. The question is, are you willing to work for it? If so, there’s nothing impossible on unachievable. Everything starts and end in your mind.
If you are ready to create your own path and start your own business by doing what you truly enjoy and love, then make sure you are ready to fully dedicate your time to building your business, put in extra-long days for months or even years, be ready to face obstacles on your entrepreneurial path that you would need to overcome while counting mostly on yourself. Sounds scary and uncomfortable, doesn’t it? It sure does. But guess what, nothing worth having is easily achievable.
What does it take?
To reach greatness and success, you must dedicate your time, energy, and resources to get to the top. That is why very few people reach the top, because, it is very difficult to get there, it requires dedication and extreme desire to reach your dream no matter what you may encounter on your path to success. It also requires you to follow what you want, think and feel versus conforming to thoughts and opinions of others while keeping your wants and needs to yourself. So, what do you hope to achieve and what are you going to do to get there?
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