Avoiding unnecessary periods of worry, frustration, and disappointment when we can be in control and prepared
Holding on to the present
What does holding on to the present will get you in the long run? I’ll tell you, it will get you periods of frustration, worry, hopelessness, anger, and after, depression. Why is that? Why holding on to the present can, and often will lead to negativity and disappointment? Often, it is because of our inability to control what is happening around us at all times, good and bad. We think that we are in control, we think that nothing can happen to security of our jobs, our careers, style of living, and quality of life. But then life happens to us, things don’t go as we had envisioned them, such as we lose our jobs, whether it is due to unexpected layoffs, getting fired due to underperformance or failure to meet boss’s high expectations, fail to fin into the company’s culture, or face unexpected and unplanned expenses – car breaking down, even though everything was working like a clock a day prior. What happens then, when we are faced with unfortunate but possible situations mentioned earlier? What often happens is, instead of moving on with life and look for solutions, we choose to hold on to the current, keep our mind focused on what’s happening ‘inside the box’, subconsciously knowing that there’s nothing that we can do with what already happened. We fail to recognize that life goes on, and so should we.
Looking for someone or something to blame
I’ve seen so many great people missing out on great opportunities in life, because, they simply were busy looking for someone or something to blame for their temporary misfortunes, and often those temporary misfortunes ended up lasing for long periods of time due to fault of our own. When one opportunity often even more beneficial with greater rewards would come. However, in order to notice the new opportunity, we need to be ready to see it and accept it. It can be very difficult to do when your mind is filled with frustration, anger, and/or negativity in general. When our mind is closed to something new and different, and operates in constant state of worry, we tend to perform poorly on interviews when searching for a new opportunity. Why? Because, we are not present in the moment, we are not giving our 100%, and as result we sound less confident, unfocused, and unsure of ourselves and our own abilities and skills even though we know that we have them and can accomplish objectives outlined in the job description with ease. These verbal and physical queues get quickly noticed by others, such as hiring managers, and potentially great opportunity that you thought you were qualified for and wanted slips away from us. So, we go back to what we know best – blaming everything and everyone that got us to where we are today. But instead of looking for what we can to do to change, we hold on to the past, simply because it is much easier to blame life vs. fixing whatever that may be holding us back.
Life is full of surprises and challenges – are you ready for them?
We cannot and should not expect for life to always be the same without its surprises, challenges, tests, wins, and upsets. That is what makes life interesting and fun. I know, often we are faced with very tough situations which can take a lot out of us. However, any tough situation that we are or will be facing is temporary, not permanent, unless we choose to make it permanent. If we choose to remain in negative state of mind, then we should not expect for good things just begin happening to us. We must go out and look for opportunities, which could and often would help us overcome life’s challenges. Any tough situation that we face in life is a test on toughness and test of our character. Will we beat ourselves up while negatively affecting those around us, or will we take control of situation(s) and turn it into a positive one. This often can be very difficult to do, but it is not impossible. It takes time and energy to achieve great things in life, so be patient and never lose hope.
Every day is a new day – Life your head up and see the wonderful world around us
It is important to always remember that every day is a new day, and things change all the time, just like we change every day as we get older and wiser. Knowing and remembering this can help us to be ready for change wherever and whenever we may face it. But when you are not attached to present, and always ready for things to change with and without notice, we prepare ourselves mentally, and are not angry, frustrated, or defeated when life happens, because, we are always ready for changes to come.
I hope you enjoyed reading this module as much as I enjoyed writing it, and hope that you found it to be very useful for you or someone else that you may know. Please feel free to share this post if you know someone who may benefit from reading it same way you did
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