Aleksandr E. Kheyson | Heart & Mind of a Leader
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Article 189 - Conformists Dilemma

9/15/2020

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Having to make a choice every day whether to live our life based on opinions of others or our own

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Many of us tend to listen to what others are telling us what to do, what to say, how to feel, etc., which causes us to live in someone else’s reality, not our own. Instead of asking ourselves how we feel about a particular topic or situation, we are asking and waiting for someone else to tell us. Why? Why can’t we simply think for ourselves and follow what our own mind and heart are telling us?

I believe that we have conditioned our brains to focus on and follow that what is popular, that what others are talking about and following. It is hard to recondition our minds to begin thinking and making decisions on our own, because we have been following group and public opinion for so long. It does not mean that It is impossible to change and start placing our own interests, opinions, and values ahead of public interests and objectives.
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It is important to remember that when things get tough in our life, we would typically have to only rely on ourselves to overcome temporary challenges in our life. Nobody is going to come offering help and support voluntary, because that would mean that they would actually have to do something., which would take them away from their own daily routine, goals, and needs. Therefore, we should not forget to think about things that are important to us, our family, and our future, and ensure that our actions and choices align with our goals and objectives first, before letting outside opinions influence us and our actions. When reading or watching news on tv or social media it is important to remember to ask ourselves – what do we think about topics or issues being discussed by others. Do we agree with thoughts and opinions of other people or do we disagree, because, we gave it some thought and did our own research helped us to form our personal opinion vs. going along with what we may be expected to think and feel? Not saying that anyone must go on social media to express their own points of view, actually quite the opposite, as long as we agree with our own decisions, thoughts, and feelings internally, that’s what is important. If our own opinions align with our actions and personal goals and objectives, that is what should lead to happy and fulfilling life. 
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