Finding much needed and ever-present support and motivation when things don't go according to the plan
The love and care for my family is what gives me strength and purpose in life. It’s what gives me the willingness to try and work hard every day, no matter how tired or discouraged I may be at times. Simply knowing that my family depends on me, believes in me, and gives me unconditional love and support is enough drive and fuel that I need to give it my all, give my best to everything that I do or start.
We all need motivation and support, especially in times when things don’t exactly go according to plan or create struggle. That is when it’s very important to have those whom we love and care about to remind us of why we do what we do each day, and those difficult times will pass, followed by a period of great success and happiness. It’s not easy to navigate life’s challenges alone, so having your family, your loved ones by your side supporting you along the way, could be the best source of motivation needed.
Some of us may not have our family close by, standing by our side, however, having a close friend to whom we can turn to, someone with whom we can speak freely and share our inner thought, concerns, and worries, can help us to re-motivate ourselves, re-energize and re-focus in order to keep trying, keep going pursuing our personal and professional goals and dreams that we all have.
It also helps to put our thoughts and everything that’s been piling up in our head on paper in a way of a daily journaling. This way we are able to move all worries, all overwhelming thoughts, all ideas on paper and out of our head. Doing so not only will we be able to have a clear focus and clear mind, but also we would be able to reference our thoughts and concerns by reviewing them at an time, and come up with a plan of action to address them over time. So, in my opinion, it is a win-win situation. Do you agree?
Our written thoughts, those that we share with our loved ones, our closest friends not only serve as reminders and triggers in our mind why we chose to pursue a particular goal, task, or an adventure, but also they can create images which translate to feeling in our mind of how we would feel when set goal or objective is reached. It’s like reviewing your own physical vision board, if you have one created, full of places you hope to visit or things that you hope to have one day. The best part is, with mental reminders we can reach them any time, anywhere as a source of motivation and inspiration fueled by the support and love for and of our family, our loved ones, our close friends.
So, be happy, stay positive, motivated, inspired, and focused every single day, no matter how tough things may get at times. Remember that you are not alone and that your family, your loved ones, your close friend(s) believe in you, so should you. As Maya Angelou once said: “I sustain myself with the love of family.”
Leading others by being a mentor and teacher, not know-it-all and do-it-all boss
As a leader, have you ever looked a specific project or task of yours and thought to yourself that it would have been much faster and easier to do it yourself vs. teaching someone else, and delegating the task or project to him or her? I have. But, every time such thought would come to my mind, I had to remind myself that by doing everything on my own, the only individual who benefits from performing a particular task is just me. So, am I teaching others how to perform the task, grow their knowledge and experience base in order to teach and train someone else in the future? No, absolutely not. As leaders, our main goal is to lead others by being an example to them, by being a teacher and a mentor, not self-focused manager who assigns tasks and then instead of helping others learn and work along side of them, just does everything on his or her own.
If we never teach others how to perform certain tasks required for the job in question, they may never learn how to perform such task and, therefore, never add such experience to the ever-increasing list of professional skills, as even the most experienced and highly skilled leaders and managers, we cannot do everything on our own, we must rely on other people whom we are leading to help us, and delegate various projects and responsibilities to them. We must learn how to let things go out of our hands into the hands of those whom we lead and be there for them as a resource and a mentor when they need our support and guidance.
As leaders, we can still be involved in the process by establishing a set of periodic check ins with our team and individual team members to ensure that everyone has an opportunity to check on the progress of the project delegated, to ensure that team is still on target to meet set expectations by previously established deadlines.
Just like the process of teaching someone how to ride a bike, it’s one thing to show them how you can do it, but it’s completely different and more effective when we provide an opportunity to practice and learn. Sure, mistakes will be made, sure there will be failures and disappointments along the way, but that’s all a part of a learning process. Everyone makes mistakes regardless how experienced they may be, as we make mistakes, we learn from them and try not to repeat same mistakes in the future.
The main point in everything that was said earlier is we as leaders and managers must understand and recognize the importance of empowering others, and provide them with an opportunity to learn and grow as employees, as professionals, and as current and future leaders. As Bill Gates once said: “As we look ahead into the next century, leaders will be those who empower others.”
Creating a plan and going after our goals and objectives
Most of our life we wait for something, whether it’s waiting for a better job, bigger home, more money, ability to travel internationally on demand, or simply to spend some time one on one with the nature – relaxing and enjoying the beautiful world around us. We hope one day that what we so desire, the one thing that we so desperately want would somehow become available to us or become your new reality. The problem is, most of us continue to wait our entire life for things to come to us, for opportunities to find us, and they never do. Why would they? Why would new opportunities, new experiences, new lifestyle all of the sudden come to us when we are doing absolutely nothing to achieve it, when we are making zero effort to actually try to turn our inner wants and desires into reality? They would not. New experiences and new opportunities come to those who are putting in the effort and doing everything they can to turn their goals into reality, even if it is hard and when everyone else is doubting them.
So, if we genuinely want something, then we should go after it, instead of waiting for a better time, or putting off taking action until a later time. If you always wanted to travel across the world or simply to visit another country, then, perhaps, you can start by creating a plan of how you will achieve your goal by set date. Put things in writing and set realistic deadlines or checkpoints, so that you can measure your progress. Another thing that you can and should do is to create a budget, listing costs and other expenses that you would need to save up for in order to fulfill your dream of taking a trip to another country, and have comfortable and enjoyable time while traveling. Once you outline your plan, set deadlines/checkpoints, and create a budget, outlining how much money you will save by set date, then, instead of a wish in your mind, this turns into something real, something that you can work towards over time. Make sure that goals and checkpoints, target dates, and the budget that you create are real, not based on what the job you hope to have, or amount of money you hope to make one day. Be real with your present situation, and set your goals and expectations based on reality. This way, you would be actually working towards something that you are capable of achieving if you stay focused and determined of reaching the goal that you have set. So, if I know that in order for me to save up enough money and vacation time to go to Paris, I need to work 40 hours per week and save every penny after paying bills and other obligations each month, and based on my current income it would take me one year to save enough of money to be able to take a trip of a lifetime, setting a goal of going to Paris in three months simply does not align with reality and will be the source of disappointment and discouragement when I reach three month mark and barely have any money saved up.
The point is, instead of waiting for an opportunities to find us, we must create such opportunities by taking action, creating a realistic plan, and begin working towards it, even if we know that it may be a while be fore we can reach the finish line. At least this way we are making progress, even if it is a slow progress, which would enable us to reach our goal(s) and turn our dreams that otherwise would remain as dreams into reality. Go after your dream(s), stop waiting for a better time to start.
Strong support and unbreakable trust components in a professional life of a leader
How many of you were going into an important meeting prepared, full of knowledge and confidence, ready to tackle complex and important issues in order to help to move business forward, just to have your confidence destroyed, because, you felt that you were in the meeting alone, in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by uncertainty, fear, danger, issues, unanswered questions, and absolutely no support that you once had behind you? I have, and it is not a pleasant feeling at all. It’s a feeling as if all of your confidence and desire to make things better and change the world, or at least improve and enhance your present situation for you and those around you, all of the sudden just evaporated. You feel like you no longer have the same drive and willingness to work extremely hard to change or fix something that may be broken. Why? Because, you realize that you are alone on this once important to you and others journey. You realize that there is nobody behind you who will help you up should you fall. So, then, you begin asking yourself questions such as – Do I really need spend all of my valuable time and energy working on something that may never be recognized, materialized, and/or appreciated? Should I focus all of my energy on something else that is important to me instead, on something that brings me joy, happiness, and a huge sense f personal and professional accomplishment?
So, why as leaders we need to have someone behind us who believes in us, respects us, and who would support us no matter what when things get difficult, when we need them the most in order to keep moving forward in our journey of personal and professional growth and development, while changing and fixing things that may be broken along the way? Because, even though we are strong internally and full of confidence in our own abilities and strengths, we are human beings who need to be reminded that we have strong support behind us when we hit a roadblock, or face a challenging situation in our professional life that requires a team to overcome. We need someone who will have our back when we are exhausted and down and need for someone whom we trust to step in and be our support and motivation, someone who will help protect and strengthen our inner confidence and desire to win even in most challenging situations.
Such support system could be your spouse, your best friend, or your boss(s) in your place of business. It’s someone who you can turn to for help, someone who will listen to you, your needs and opinions, anytime you need to speak, and would do everything they can to help you to overcome whatever challenge or difficult situation that you may be facing together with you. Having such support behind you at all times gives you strength, confidence, and desire to keep fighting for what you believe is right, even when things get very difficult. You know that if you make a mistake or fail, someone will be there to help you recognize that what may need to be addressed, corrected, and improved, and help you to try again and again, and not waving all of your mistakes and failures in front of you destroying your confidence and any accomplishments you had achieved to date.
So, if you feel like you don’t have strong support behind you today, make an effort to seek such support, whether it’s at your place of business, or at home, or both, as you can never have enough support when you need it the most. See if you can find a mentor who may be your go to when you need help, support, and guidance. And no matter what, always believe in yourself and you will accomplish amazing things.
Doing that what you love, on your own terms with poise, determination, and never-giving-up attitude
Have you ever been in a difficult situation when you were ready to give up, because, it was too difficult or that you didn’t see any results and payoff for the work you’ve put in? I know I have. There have been many situations when things were just tough, whether it was a situation that I was dealing with in my personal life or the professional challenges that I had faced. All I wanted to do at that time is to stop trying, stop working, just give up on my goals and plans, and simply do nothing. However, what kept me going, and continues to keep me focused and working hard on everything that I do is the mental reminder of why I do what I do, why I cannot stop trying and just give up, how me giving up on my goals would effect those that I love and care about. So, even though giving up may appear as the easiest thing to do, going through mental reminders prove that giving up or stop trying is never a solution, it is simply an excuse that we often choose to use.
Who said that reaching something important, something significant would be an easy task? It is not easy; it is exceedingly difficult. We often get discouraged by many internal and external factors, we get sidetracked by distractions and problems that we all often face in life. However, those distractions and discouragements that we often face should never be a reason for us to give up or believe or challenge our belief in a successful outcome. Listen, I get it, sometimes things do not go according to plan, our plan, we often fail, we miss opportunities, we do not receive recognition that we feel that we deserve, but so what? As long as we keep going, keep trying, and giving everything that we do or start our absolute best, eventually we will be rewarded for our hard work, persistence, and positive focus and attitude. Anyone is capable of giving up but continuing and doing what it takes to power through challenges, mistakes and failures takes courage and never-giving-up attitude.
You may be trying to build your business now, or perhaps, you have been trying to do so for a while now without seeing any results, so should you give up and stop trying? Of course not. If you are engaged in doing what you love, do it for yourself, do it because you love doing it, not because someone expects it from you. If you enjoy writing articles, books, journaling, keep doing it if that is what makes you happy. Sure, if your goal is to sell your books or what you create and you do not see any sales, it can be discouraging. But ask yourself if you doing it purely for money, or you doing it because you enjoy it with a goal of eventually make money from it and not because that’s what you need, but because someone you and others like what you do and find your work and creation useful and interesting. In this case you never lose, you win because you are doing that what you love, what you enjoy every day, and at the same time that work bring fulfillment, happiness, and eventually revenue. If you goal is to sell your work, your creation, and that’s the only reason why you are doing it, it will be tough road to create and follow when you see no immediate results, no sales, and no revenue. Because, you are focusing on expected end result, and not on doing that what brings you enjoyment and happiness each day, regardless whether you see the expected end result now or sometime in the future. It’s much easier to be happy each day doing what you enjoy, doing it at your own pace, and never stopping or giving up until our end goal is achieved, then stressing out about things that you cannot control, fueled by objectives and expectations of others, which do not align with our own.
In any situation always look on the bright side, find positive things to focus your mind on, even if everything around you may not be so bright. That positive focus would often help you get through tough times and motivate everyone around you. Regardless how tough a particular situation may be in our personal or professional life, remember that it is temporary and will eventually pass, followed by something good. So, never give up on yourself and what you are trying to achieve, keep reminding yourself why you are doing it, and always look on the bright side finding something positive in each situation. Hard work, persistence, positive focus, and never-give-up attitude to life will eventually pay off.
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